| reading time – 2 mins|

The second part of our troublesome trio of worry, fear and guilt! Let’s focus on fear today, because this seems to be at the root of the majority of conversations that I have with clients.

How many can you tick?

• I question what I’m doing and whether I can make it a success
• I’m fearing that I’m expecting too much
• I’m afraid that I’m not good enough
• I’m afraid that everyone will laugh at me and I’ll be humiliated
• I’m afraid that I’ll be a huge success and I won’t be able to deliver

If you’re going to be in business, if you’re going to need to be putting yourself “out there” on a regular basis, if you’re doing something innovative – you’d better be ready to feel fear. The trick is how to manage it so that it doesn’t slow you down. I tell my clients that they’d better get ready to get comfortable with feeling uncomfortable!

1) Remember fear is only ever in the mind. It’s not real. 

It’s important to remember that fear is only ever in the mind, yet because it feels oh-so-real, it controls our thoughts, which control our behaviours and that’s when it can restrict us in business. I want you to name your fear – call it out into the open. Acknowledge it.

2) What is this fear teaching you?

You’ll know that we’re all born with a natural fight or flight response – a reflex action that originates from the most primitive part of our brain. Very handy when we needed to preserve our life in the face of a snarling cave lion a few thousand years ago. Much less handy when we find ourselves sweating at the thought of public speaking, getting on the telephone or hesitating over pressing “publish” on a blog post!

3) Practice self-love

Ever noticed that you’re harder on yourself that you ever would be on someone else? Would you speak to your best friend in the same way you speak to yourself? Unlikely, right?! Take some time out. Breathe. Do what you need to do to ground yourself. I love to get into the big outdoors and go for a a hike with my dog. When I come back to my work I’m full of fresh courage and ready to kick it.

What can you do to practice self-care right now? Write down some words that you would speak to your best friend in the same situation.

4) Get comfortable with feeling uncomfortable

It can be hard to consciously change our feelings and our thoughts but it’s not impossible, especially if you have an empathetic coach championing your genius and challenging those fear thoughts.

Another way of looking at it is to start by changing your ACTIONS. This can have a beneficial effect on your thoughts, which starts to change your feelings! Magic eh?! So what could be the first tiniest action that you could take towards doing the thing that you’re afraid of doing? OK – go and do it – I know you can!